The one where we announce something ...

I liked helloheather's title, so I thought I would co-opt it. We have some news we would like to share ... but it ain't about us! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I'm so evil. No, it turns out I'm going to be an uncle. My brother called me this morning to let me know his wife is with child. I wish them all the best, but I'm a little wary about being an uncle now. Back in 2001, there was an uncle who did a little something to expand the list of Duties an Uncle Must Perform. Thanks to him, it is now the duty of the uncle to capture a shark bare handed if one attacks the niece/nephew. Great. How does one go about training for this? Any ideas would be welcome.